Anntoinette Romney

Dear Anntoinette Romney:

You will never be First Lady, despite the fact that you very clearly feel that the position is your due. EVERY first lady, including Laura Bush, bless her heart for being married to that clod, exhibited the ability to conduct herself with a certain level of grace and decorum. It is the job of the First Lady (or First Gentleman, as the case may be), to act as a buffer for the President, to carry out the duties of the First Spouse in a dignified manner, and to exhibit kindness, thoughtfulness and diplomacy, irrespective of Party affiliation. Even if, by some longshot (or election fraud), your husband should somehow gain the office, I'm sure he will immediately demote you and appoint one of your more demure and graceful Sister Wives to the position.

Love,

TV