tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-35283253091920156592024-02-19T15:58:25.912-08:00Icky Lady PartsThinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.comBlogger36125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-13108492766886885572020-04-09T02:48:00.002-07:002020-04-09T02:48:55.862-07:00Take Care of Yourself I came across this on Facebook and thought perhaps it might reach someone who needs it if I posted it here. Times are tough, we are all stressed and worried, and there is a lot of good advice here, stuff it took me years of therapy to figure out. You get it for free!<br />
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From <a href="https://www.facebook.com/1468844994/posts/10221877604477126/?d=n" target="_blank">Margie Donlon</a><br />
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From a psychologist:<br />
After having thirty-one sessions this week with patients where the singular focus was COVID-19 and how to cope, I decided to consolidate my advice and make a list that I hope is helpful to all. I can't control a lot of what is going on right now, but I can contribute this. <br />
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Edit: I am surprised and heartened that this has been shared so widely! People have asked me to credential myself, so to that end, I am a doctoral level Psychologist in NYS with a Psy.D. in the specialities of School and Clinical Psychology. <br />
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MENTAL HEALTH WELLNESS TIPS FOR QUARANTINE<br />
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1. Stick to a routine. Go to sleep and wake up at a reasonable time, write a schedule that is varied and includes time for work as well as self-care.<br />
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2. Dress for the social life you want, not the social life you have. Get showered and dressed in comfortable clothes, wash your face, brush your teeth. Take the time to do a bath or a facial. Put on some bright colors. It is amazing how our dress can impact our mood.<br />
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3. Get out at least once a day, for at least thirty minutes. If you are concerned of contact, try first thing in the morning, or later in the evening, and try less traveled streets and avenues. If you are high risk or living with those who are high risk, open the windows and blast the fan. It is amazing how much fresh air can do for spirits.<br />
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4. Find some time to move each day, again daily for at least thirty minutes. If you don’t feel comfortable going outside, there are many YouTube videos that offer free movement classes, and if all else fails, turn on the music and have a dance party!<br />
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5. Reach out to others, you guessed it, at least once daily for thirty minutes. Try to do FaceTime, Skype, phone calls, texting—connect with other people to seek and provide support. Don’t forget to do this for your children as well. Set up virtual playdates with friends daily via FaceTime, Facebook Messenger Kids, Zoom, etc—your kids miss their friends, too!<br />
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6. Stay hydrated and eat well. This one may seem obvious, but stress and eating often don’t mix well, and we find ourselves over-indulging, forgetting to eat, and avoiding food. Drink plenty of water, eat some good and nutritious foods, and challenge yourself to learn how to cook something new!<br />
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7. Develop a self-care toolkit. This can look different for everyone. A lot of successful self-care strategies involve a sensory component (seven senses: touch, taste, sight, hearing, smell, vestibular (movement) and proprioceptive (comforting pressure). An idea for each: a soft blanket or stuffed animal, a hot chocolate, photos of vacations, comforting music, lavender or eucalyptus oil, a small swing or rocking chair, a weighted blanket. A journal, an inspirational book, or a mandala coloring book is wonderful, bubbles to blow or blowing watercolor on paper through a straw are visually appealing as well as work on controlled breath. Mint gum, Listerine strips, ginger ale, frozen Starburst, ice packs, and cold are also good for anxiety regulation. For children, it is great to help them create a self-regulation comfort box (often a shoe-box or bin they can decorate) that they can use on the ready for first-aid when overwhelmed. <br />
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8. Spend extra time playing with children. Children will rarely communicate how they are feeling, but will often make a bid for attention and communication through play. Don’t be surprised to see therapeutic themes of illness, doctor visits, and isolation play through. Understand that play is cathartic and helpful for children—it is how they process their world and problem solve, and there’s a lot they are seeing and experiencing in the now.<br />
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9. Give everyone the benefit of the doubt, and a wide berth. A lot of cooped up time can bring out the worst in everyone. Each person will have moments when they will not be at their best. It is important to move with grace through blowups, to not show up to every argument you are invited to, and to not hold grudges and continue disagreements. Everyone is doing the best they can to make it through this.<br />
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10. Everyone find their own retreat space. Space is at a premium, particularly with city living. It is important that people think through their own separate space for work and for relaxation. For children, help them identify a place where they can go to retreat when stressed. You can make this place cozy by using blankets, pillows, cushions, scarves, beanbags, tents, and “forts”. It is good to know that even when we are on top of each other, we have our own special place to go to be alone.<br />
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11. Expect behavioral issues in children, and respond gently. We are all struggling with disruption in routine, none more than children, who rely on routines constructed by others to make them feel safe and to know what comes next. Expect increased anxiety, worries and fears, nightmares, difficulty separating or sleeping, testing limits, and meltdowns. Do not introduce major behavioral plans or consequences at this time—hold stable and focus on emotional connection.<br />
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12. Focus on safety and attachment. We are going to be living for a bit with the unprecedented demand of meeting all work deadlines, homeschooling children, running a sterile household, and making a whole lot of entertainment in confinement. We can get wrapped up in meeting expectations in all domains, but we must remember that these are scary and unpredictable times for children. Focus on strengthening the connection through time spent following their lead, through physical touch, through play, through therapeutic books, and via verbal reassurances that you will be there for them in this time.<br />
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13. Lower expectations and practice radical self-acceptance. This idea is connected with #12. We are doing too many things in this moment, under fear and stress. This does not make a formula for excellence. Instead, give yourself what psychologists call “radical self acceptance”: accepting everything about yourself, your current situation, and your life without question, blame, or pushback. You cannot fail at this—there is no roadmap, no precedent for this, and we are all truly doing the best we can in an impossible situation. <br />
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14. Limit social media and COVID conversation, especially around children. One can find tons of information on COVID-19 to consume, and it changes minute to minute. The information is often sensationalized, negatively skewed, and alarmist. Find a few trusted sources that you can check in with consistently, limit it to a few times a day, and set a time limit for yourself on how much you consume (again 30 minutes tops, 2-3 times daily). Keep news and alarming conversations out of earshot from children—they see and hear everything, and can become very frightened by what they hear.<br />
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15. Notice the good in the world, the helpers. There is a lot of scary, negative, and overwhelming information to take in regarding this pandemic. There are also a ton of stories of people sacrificing, donating, and supporting one another in miraculous ways. It is important to counter-balance the heavy information with the hopeful information. <br />
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16. Help others. Find ways, big and small, to give back to others. Support restaurants, offer to grocery shop, check in with elderly neighbors, write psychological wellness tips for others—helping others gives us a sense of agency when things seem out of control. <br />
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17. Find something you can control, and control the heck out of it. In moments of big uncertainty and overwhelm, control your little corner of the world. Organize your bookshelf, purge your closet, put together that furniture, group your toys. It helps to anchor and ground us when the bigger things are chaotic.<br />
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18. Find a long-term project to dive into. Now is the time to learn how to play the keyboard, put together a huge jigsaw puzzle, start a 15 hour game of Risk, paint a picture, read the Harry Potter series, binge watch an 8-season show, crochet a blanket, solve a Rubix cube, or develop a new town in Animal Crossing. Find something that will keep you busy, distracted, and engaged to take breaks from what is going on in the outside world.<br />
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19. Engage in repetitive movements and left-right movements. Research has shown that repetitive movement (knitting, coloring, painting, clay sculpting, jump roping etc) especially left-right movement (running, drumming, skating, hopping) can be effective at self-soothing and maintaining self-regulation in moments of distress.<br />
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20. Find an expressive art and go for it. Our emotional brain is very receptive to the creative arts, and it is a direct portal for release of feeling. Find something that is creative (sculpting, drawing, dancing, music, singing, playing) and give it your all. See how relieved you can feel. It is a very effective way of helping kids to emote and communicate as well!<br />
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21. Find lightness and humor in each day. There is a lot to be worried about, and with good reason. Counterbalance this heaviness with something funny each day: cat videos on YouTube, a stand-up show on Netflix, a funny movie—we all need a little comedic relief in our day, every day.<br />
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22. Reach out for help—your team is there for you. If you have a therapist or psychiatrist, they are available to you, even at a distance. Keep up your medications and your therapy sessions the best you can. If you are having difficulty coping, seek out help for the first time. There are mental health people on the ready to help you through this crisis. Your children’s teachers and related service providers will do anything within their power to help, especially for those parents tasked with the difficult task of being a whole treatment team to their child with special challenges. Seek support groups of fellow home-schoolers, parents, and neighbors to feel connected. There is help and support out there, any time of the day—although we are physically distant, we can always connect virtually.<br />
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23. “Chunk” your quarantine, take it moment by moment. We have no road map for this. We don’t know what this will look like in 1 day, 1 week, or 1 month from now. Often, when I work with patients who have anxiety around overwhelming issues, I suggest that they engage in a strategy called “chunking”—focusing on whatever bite-sized piece of a challenge that feels manageable. Whether that be 5 minutes, a day, or a week at a time—find what feels doable for you, and set a time stamp for how far ahead in the future you will let yourself worry. Take each chunk one at a time, and move through stress in pieces.<br />
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24. Remind yourself daily that this is temporary. It seems in the midst of this quarantine that it will never end. It is terrifying to think of the road stretching ahead of us. Please take time to remind yourself that although this is very scary and difficult, and will go on for an undetermined amount of time, it is a season of life and it will pass. We will return to feeing free, safe, busy, and connected in the days ahead.<br />
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25. Find the lesson. This whole crisis can seem sad, senseless, and at times, avoidable. When psychologists work with trauma, a key feature to helping someone work through said trauma is to help them find their agency, the potential positive outcomes they can effect, the meaning and construction that can come out of destruction. What can each of us learn here, in big and small ways, from this crisis? What needs to change in ourselves, our homes, our communities, our nation, and our world?Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-618623953855627602014-08-22T13:47:00.001-07:002014-08-22T13:47:36.611-07:00People Are Assholes<br /><br />
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I will probably be writing some things here about the happenings in Ferguson, as the whole thing just has me alternating between spitting mad and profoundly sad.<br />
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But, I came across this. <br />
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<a href="http://www.gq.com/news-politics/newsmakers/201409/the-last-true-hermit?printable=true" target="_blank">The Last True Hermit</a><br />
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I think that they should have just left the guy alone and let him go
back to his home in the woods, is what I think. People are "terrorized
and frightened" because their marshmallow fluff and propane are stolen?
WTF? He didn't harm anyone. He never stole anything of real value. A
kinder, more compassionate community would have noticed the pattern of
thefts of only Needful Things, and maybe just left "donations" of these
sorts of items out where he could find them. But, no. The man who found
solace in solitude had to be hunted down and prosecuted and made
miserable for the rest of his life. People are just such huge fucking
assholes. I'm tempted to trot off to the woods somewhere, myself.Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-55641187181370453502013-12-22T15:30:00.001-08:002013-12-22T15:30:33.089-08:00So, This is Christmas<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">By now, Diane should have received the check I sent. Unlike her, I am not a Believer, but I do hold in my heart the hope that the best of the human spirit will prevail in times of trouble. This hope has been kept alive, yet again, through the efforts of everyone who sent a donation or a kind thought to our friend in her time of need. I hope it's enough. I hope that all the Dianes out there have Enough. I hope that, someday, we reach a point where it's just understood that everyone should have Enough. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Again, I thank you all for your generosity. I may call on you again, and, if I do, I hope that you will be there. You are the best that humanity has to offer. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Love,</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">K..</span>Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-43884284730542656192013-12-11T08:28:00.001-08:002013-12-11T08:28:11.185-08:00Thank You<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Through the collective efforts of Atriots past and present, readers of Diane's blog, and other friends, we have managed to surpass the goal of collecting $1,800 to pay Diane's last month's rent at the care facility where she resides. At the end of the week, I will be mailing her a check for $2,200. I can't thank you all enough for your generosity, and for all the kind emails you sent expressing your love and concern for our friend in her time of need. Rest assured that your good wishes will be conveyed to her along with your financial contributions.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">I have tried multiple times to compose this post, and each time I was overwhelmed. First, by the simply stunning outpouring of affection and generosity of those who care for Diane, but second, and somewhat surprisingly, by anger. This may not be the most appropriate place to express it, but it really makes me angry that this fundraiser even needed to happen. A dying person should not have to concern herself with these matters. Her friends should not have to rally to scrape together the funds for her last expenses. I'm so heartened, and so relieved that we were able to manage this, but what if we had not been able to? What, then? What would happen to Diane? What happens to all the "Dianes" out there who don't have a network like this? This is something that simply should not happen in a civilized society, and it makes me incredibly angry. I'm not sure what to do with that.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">For now, I suppose it will be enough to be happy and grateful that we were able to bring some comfort and peace to a friend in her time of need.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Thank you for that.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Peace,</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">K..</span>Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-86815487388805014222013-12-05T17:01:00.005-08:002013-12-05T17:01:44.747-08:00Gratitude<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'm about to shut it down for the evening, as my tired old ass has done
all I can for this day, but I wanted to let you all know that due to
your generosity, we have well surpassed our goal of collecting $1800 for
Diane, and that's just through the PayPal link I put up. I will have
something to say about all this tomorrow, when I'm not so tired and not
so completely verklempt, but, damn, youse are the best fucking fucks
I've ever had the pleasure to know. Anyone who says Internet friends
aren't "real" friends can fucking blow me, and by that, I mean, again.</span> Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-13093099577732347382013-12-03T16:22:00.002-08:002013-12-03T16:22:53.116-08:00Solidarity<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As many of you know, one of our own beloved, Diane, of </span><a href="http://cabdrollery.blogspot.com/" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Cabdrollery,</span></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> has been experiencing serious health issues for quite some time. She is currently in good hands, receiving excellent and loving hospice care in California.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I have been corresponding with her, as she no longer has Internet access (although efforts to re-establish that may continue, if she is willing and able), and one of the things that she mentioned is that she is in need of financial assistance. The facility in which she currently resides has asked that she pay her last month's rent (although that is not necessarily this very month, please do note), to the tune of about $1,800. If I had that much to spare, myself, I would simply send her a check, but, fact of the matter is, I don't. However, I know the Atriots, past and present, to be an overly generous and extraordinarily kind group of human beings, and so, on Diane's behalf, I humbly beg for your help.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Diane will surely not be with us for too terribly much longer. For now, she is receiving good care and is not in pain. I think it would be a kind thing and a blessing to at least ease her passing by helping to relieve her worries about finances. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">All donations large and small will be most gratefully accepted. Thank you so much for whatever you can do to help our friend.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Love,</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">K..</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;"></span><br />
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Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-28179409484679376882012-12-22T12:25:00.001-08:002012-12-22T13:29:43.929-08:00Here There Be MonstersI (and many others) have been accused of "politicizing" the recent murders of 26 people in Newtown, CT. I have been berated for not showing sufficient deference to the victims and their families by not talking about the "gun issue." I am told that I should set this aside in favor of simply feeling badly for them, of offering thoughts and prayers and sympathies to them, that "now is not the time" to discuss the reasons for this bloodbath. What kind of person am I that I could put my own feelings above those of the people most directly affected? Have I no shame? <br />
<br />
First of all, I do feel badly. I feel incredibly badly. As a woman, a mother, a grandmother, hell, as a <em>human being</em>, my heart absoutley breaks for each and every one of those gunned down, for their parents, their grandparents, their husbands and wives, their families, friends and neighbors. I simply cannot conceive of the level of pain and suffering that comes with such a thing. How will they ever mourn? Will they ever stop mourning? But how can my offers of sympathy, my empty prayers, ever offer any consolation? What good will they do? The bile rises as I think of those 26 coffins, 20 of them far too small, being rolled down the aisles of places of worship and placed in cold December graves. I look at the <a href="http://abcnews.go.com/US/sandy-hook-elementary-school-shooting-victims/story?id=17984685" target="_blank">bright faces</a> of those children, the obvious love and dedication to them on the faces of their teachers, those who died trying to protect them, and the tears well up in my eyes. What good are my tears? Will they comfort the survivors? Will they bring back the dead?<br />
<br />
Secondly, this issue was politicized long before the rampage at Sandy Hook Elementary. It has been politicized for decades by people like Wayne LaPierre, and the organization he heads. Under their influence, millions of people have been convinced that their absolute right to own any sort of weapon, with no regulation whatsoever, outweighs the right of children and their teachers to be safe in schools, of people to go see a movie and come out alive, of Christmas shoppers to buy gifts for their loved ones without being gunned down where they stand. When I see that Merchant of Death <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SZb8EXUrQTo" target="_blank">give a speech</a>, even before the latest bodies have been buried, encouraging, no, demanding, that the only solution to such mayhem is more mayhem, in the form of yet more weapons in the hands of yet more people, under the guise of "security," the bile that had been rising reaches its destination, and I retch. When he stands in front of the nation and dares to put the blame on movies, or music, or video games, instead of where it belongs, on him and people like him, who peddle fear to the masses, offering the comfort only of weapons of mass destruction against it, I scream in my head, and sometimes aloud. It makes me physically ill that monsters like this are taken seriously and given a place in our discourse. The only place for men like this is in a locked ward where they can't do any more damage. <br />
<br />
I think to myself how different peoples' reactions might be if, instead of being shown the smiling faces of the victims, before their young lives were snuffed out, they were shown the results of decades of fear-mongering and lobbying for the gun industry. What would gutless politicians and babbling talking heads say if they had to see the bullet-ridden bodies, the blood-stained party dresses, the brains of their precious children splattered on walls and floors? These are the things we ask people like those police and rescue crews to look at. They had to see that. Why are we spared? How different would our discourse be if people were forced to face the bloody, violent ends of their pontifications about "rights?"<br />
<br />
You're damned right I'm going to talk about this, and I will do it in the strongest terms I can muster. Because this never should have happened. It could have been prevented. And I don't want it to happen again. Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-69902854402131404832012-10-07T08:29:00.000-07:002012-10-07T08:29:00.936-07:00Sunday Funnies<span class="userContent">Fun joke going around... Cannot find the original origin. <br /> <br /> Snow White, Superman and Pinocchio are walking along.<br /> They see a sign: "Contest for World's Most Beautiful Woman." Snow White goes in, later comes out smiling, wearing a crown.<br /> <br />
They walk along and see another sign: "Contest for World's Strongest
Man." Superman goes in, later comes out smiling, wearing the belt.<br /> <br />
They walk along and see a sign: "Contest for World's Greatest Liar."
Pinocchio goes in, later comes out with his head down crying.<br /> <br /> "Who the hell is Mitt Romney?" Pinocchio sobs.</span>Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-74007173509004563942012-10-05T15:35:00.001-07:002012-10-05T15:36:42.590-07:00My Time of YearHere, have a tree. My pretty little maple. I love Fall.<br />
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That time of year thou mayst in me behold<br /> When yellow leaves, or none, or few, do hang<br /> Upon those boughs which shake against the cold,<br /> Bare ruined choirs, where late the sweet birds sang.<br /> In me thou see’st the twilight of such day<br /> As after sunset fadeth in the west;<br /> Which by and by black night doth take away,<br /> Death’s second self, that seals up all in rest.<br /> In me thou see’st the glowing of such fire,<br /> That on the ashes of his youth doth lie,<br /> As the deathbed whereon it must expire,<br /> Consumed with that which it was nourished by.<br /> This thou perceiv’st, which makes thy love more strong,<br /> To love that well which thou must leave ere long.</div>
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(William Shakespeare)Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-44284842418748068102012-10-02T15:57:00.000-07:002012-10-02T15:57:10.638-07:00The Fat Lady Sings<span class="userContent"><a href="http://www.upworthy.com/bully-calls-news-anchor-fat-news-anchor-destroys-him-on-live-tv?g=2" target="_blank">News Anchor Calls Out Asshole</a></span><br />
<span class="userContent"></span><br />
<span class="userContent">Very nice. Speaking as a "fat" woman, I can
tell you, I'm probably healthier than many of my "slim" peers. I don't
eat processed foods. My blood sugar, blood pressure and cholesterol are
enviable. I exercise. I'm beautiful. Fuck you.</span><br />
<span class="userContent"></span><br />
<span class="userContent">I'm sick to fucking death of people thinking that fatness is the last refuge of discrimination. It's none of your motherfucking business how I look, what my habits might be, or what my relationship status is. I don't drink soda or eat or drink any foods or beverages that contain high fructose corn syrup. I can't tell you the last time that I ate at McDonald's or Burger King or Wendy's. Sure, I eat a cookie now and then. I like ice cream. I enjoy my food damned near as much as I enjoy my sex life, which, I assure you, is goddamned fucking fabulous. I don't buy into this Puritan notion that one shouldn't take too much pleasure at the table, as this might lead to taking too much pleasure in other areas. And I'm sick to death of feeling like I have to justify my life and my "fatness" to assholes who wouldn't know a frozen chicken nugget from a splendid coq au vin, because they never fucking learned to cook for themselves. </span><br />
<span class="userContent"></span><br />
<span class="userContent">I'm also sick to fucking death of the "obesity epidemic" being blamed on individuals. Our food system, like our "health care" system, is sick. Americans are constantly being marketed to and fed a constant diet of food that, literally, makes them sick. Even if you weigh 120 pounds, if you eat the Average American Diet, I can pretty much assure you that you will die ten years before I will. I can guarantee you that your fat, sodium, and sugar intake is ten times mine. We need to make it easier, not harder, for people to have access to fresh, healthy food. We need to encourage folks to grow their own gardens, which has the benefit of exercise as well as fresh food. We need to stop telling young girls and boys that "skinny is pretty," because, it isn't, always. And it isn't always possible. And it isn't always healthy. I was once a Size 8, but I got there through taking dangerous drugs and starving myself. I passed out often. I had hypoglycemia. I was malnutrioned to the point of being almost fatal. Is that healthier than being a Size 16 and perfect by the numbers? I don't fucking think so. If you do, if you prefer skinny girls with cancer to healthy girls with fat thighs, well, then, and I repeat myself, fuck you.</span>Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-55296122715119538432012-09-27T17:39:00.000-07:002012-09-27T17:39:47.374-07:00A Poem<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIFnpf4TqPe8sp56M8tnG5povTYywyY9V7RG8v4mUfsvtGlqpZWQYZ6K-005edf7jM0Hf3i0K648wmCeAWMVzpqGKzsriPnzS9FU4nmoWwmKBnYhC0x6tWoWGUqlLGRjkgxuF1q8f87OA/s1600/hands.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="229" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIFnpf4TqPe8sp56M8tnG5povTYywyY9V7RG8v4mUfsvtGlqpZWQYZ6K-005edf7jM0Hf3i0K648wmCeAWMVzpqGKzsriPnzS9FU4nmoWwmKBnYhC0x6tWoWGUqlLGRjkgxuF1q8f87OA/s320/hands.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
I am getting old<br />
I have my Mother's hands<br />
Weary from work<br />
Scarred by life<br />
Tired and sore<br />
Chapped and red<br />
From washing dishes and floors<br />
Scrubbing sinks and toilets<br />
Typing all day<br />
Carrying bags<br />
Tending to wounds<br />
Cleaning up messes<br />
Burned and blistered<br />
From cooking the meals<br />
Wrinkled and dry<br />
From too many years of neglect<br />
Too busy to tend to their needs<br />
Too many other important things<br />
It can wait<br />
Why put on lotion<br />
When in five minutes<br />
My hands will be wet again<br />
I am getting old<br />
But I do not mind<br />
I have my Mother's hands<br />
<br />
(Photo credit: <a href="http://www.timegoesby.net/weblog/2009/10/aging-hands.html" target="_blank">Aging Hands</a> )Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-55368279036398945382012-09-23T17:42:00.000-07:002012-09-23T17:42:33.544-07:00Feeling Down in the Dumps?So, you're sitting around, doing not much of anything, really, and you decide that you've gotten a raw deal, that Life hasn't treated you kindly. You sort of think that you're in a unique situation; no one likes you, you have no life, you're broke, no one cares, you're struggling with life issues, and you feel like you don't matter at all and wouldn't the world be better off without you, really. Well, I'm here to tell you to get off your ass and Do Something about it. Here are some things, in no particular order, that you can do that will make you feel better about Life, in general, and Your Life, in particular.<br />
<br />
1. Do something nice for someone, without being asked, and without expecting anything in return. Do a Good Deed. Be a Good Deed Doer. You won't become rich or famous, but you may make someone smile or make their heart skip a beat or turn a shitty day into a good one.<br />
<br />
2. Go for a walk around your neighborhood. Look at every house you pass, and realize that there are people inside who have problems, just like you. Maybe some of those problems are worse, maybe some not as bad, but, rest assured, every house has people in it who are struggling with something. You are not alone. Recognizing this fact helps you to put your own problems into perspective, sometimes. <br />
<br />
3. Spend some time with little kids. Spend some time with elders. Spend some time with animals. <br />
<br />
4. Spend a little time, even just a couple hours a week, volunteering. There are loads of people out there who are way worse off than you are, and with the economy the way it is, charities are strapped for funds and help. Find a soup kitchen, a food bank, a homeless shelter, a literacy program, a shelter for victims of domestic violence, a hospital, a prison, whatever. Not only does this go into the Good Deeds category, it will help you to appreciate how good you've really got it.<br />
<br />
5. Do something creative, even if you think you suck at it. Draw a picture. Write a poem or short story. Take up a musical instrument. You don't have to ever share it with anyone; just do it.<br />
<br />
6. Stop spending so much time in your own head. Introspection is a good and necessary thing, but too much of it and pretty soon the only voice you hear is your own, and you may not be giving yourself the best advice if you're depressed. Get out and talk to other human beings. Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-17491413364078442982012-09-03T19:15:00.000-07:002012-09-03T19:15:13.882-07:00On Labor DayMy mother, the daughter of a farmer (later to become auto worker) and a housewife, both Lithuanian immigrants, was born on Labor Day, 1929. As she tells it, her parents were to attend a Labor Day picnic that day, but had to cancel due to "unexpected company." My family growing up was always working class. Dad worked as a Union stagehand/lighting technician, and Mom worked as a librarian, and later, as a police dispatcher. My Dad died when I was 8, and his Social Security Survivor's Benefits meant the difference between hunger and starvation, between housing and homelessness. Paul Ryan and Eric Cantor and anyone else who means to disparage the worth of either Unions or essential social programs are cordially invited to kiss my big, white, working class ass.Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-40127334419361265342012-08-31T18:56:00.002-07:002012-08-31T18:57:24.984-07:00Note to People, in General<h6 class="uiStreamMessage userContentWrapper" data-ft="{"type":1,"tn":"K"}">
<span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="userContent"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I
don't know what ever happened to manners and common courtesy. Maybe
I'm a prude (I don't think so). But, just a couple of things to remember,
if you wish to not be publicly dressed down and embarrassed:<br /> <br />
1. The world is not your fucking living room. When out in public,
unless you are at an event/venue where rowdiness is expected, such as a
sporting event, a concert, a bar, etc., others think it considerate if
you use your "inside voice." If I am seated across from you in a
restaurant and can hear every word of your conversation, you are
speaking too loudly.</span><div class="text_exposed_show">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: small;"> <br /> 2. Your children are precious to you, but not to me. I don't find every word they utter cute and/or insightful. <br /> <br /> 3. Regarding your children: There are times/places that are appropriate for children and families, and those that are not. <br /> <br />
4. Further regarding your children: If you choose to take them with
you to a place that is really not appropriate for them, it is up to YOU
to supervise them/ensure that they behave properly. It is NOT
appropriate for you to seat yourselves at one end of the table, so that
you and your adult friends can carry on your too-loud conversation,
while seating them at the other, unsupervised, so that they can behave
like the children that they are absent your parental
supervision/instruction. <br /> <br /> 5. If you wish to go out for an
evening with your adult friends without the responsibility of looking
after your spawn, get a babysitter. Otherwise, stay home. A large part
of parenting is sacrificing your own desires so that your children get
the time and attention that they need to grow into kind, considerate
adults. <br /> <br /> Failure to adhere to these principles will, on
occasion, result in the ire of others. Don't be surprised, shocked, or
offended by it.</span></div>
</span></span></h6>
Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-88301879660423602602012-08-29T17:00:00.001-07:002012-08-29T17:02:55.450-07:00You Didn't Build That<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">No, you didn't. You really didn't. No one is begrudging anyone their success or their fortune, except in the case of Vulture Capitalists like Mitt Romney, who made his money not through hard work or the sweat of his brow, but through manipulating finances and causing other people suffering. No, what we are saying is, that in this country, we have something called The Commons. The Commons are those things that we built together, that we support together through our tax dollars; things like roads, bridges, an education and court system, police and fire departments, regulatory and enforcement agencies such as the FDA and the Department of Agriculture that keep products safe for consumers, agencies such as the EPA, which looks out for the environment that we must all live in, the Army Corps of Engineers, which does things like build levees to keep low-lying areas safe for citizens and businesses, etc. You get the picture. Without these things, "job-creators" wouldn't have workers educated enough or healthy enough to show up at work each day and perform the tasks necessary to earn profits for a business. Without police and fire protection, businesses would either be raided by bandits or burned down by arsonists, or spend a pretty penny for private protection. Without a Government-funded court system, there would be no one to mediate contract disputes, patent infringements, unfair practices and the like. Without the Interstate Highway System, the railroads (built by the Evil Government) and the FAA, there would be no means by which to get products to market. This does not even include things like Federally-insured bank accounts, college loans, or help to small businesses. I could go on and on, but you get the picture.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Contrary to what assholes like Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan will tell you, there is NO ONE who has been successful in this country without having taken advantage of at least some part of The Commons. No. One. Whether you are a one-man operation or a Fortune 500 company, you have benefitted from the efforts of others. If you employ people, your profits depend on them. I am sick and goddamned tired of hearing The Commons villified. The Commons are what make this country unique, they are what enable people to work hard and be successful, and they are what make, and keep, this country strong. To deny the fact that we are all interdependent is to deny the very basis of our Constitution and our way of life. So, FUCKING STOP IT, ALREADY. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Everyone likes to imagine him/herself as the Lone Wolf, struggling against adversity and overcoming it, all on their own, with no help from anyone, but I'm here to tell you that this just isn't so. Whether you like it or not, we're all in this together. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span><br />Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-16584817936557324552012-08-19T19:44:00.001-07:002012-08-19T19:44:45.526-07:00In Defense of Personal LibertySo, you like "personal liberty," do you? Does that include the liberty to make your own medical decisions, including whether/when to become pregnant and what to do about it if you are pregnant and don't wish to be? Does that include the liberty to be able to get medical care if you are sick, whether you can afford it or not? Does that include the liberty to enjoy the right that most Americans enjoy, to be able to marry the person of your choice? Does that include the liberty to be able to get a decent education, regardless of your economic circumstances? Does that include the liberty to be able to go to sleep at night with a roof over your head and a belly not aching from hunger? Does that include the liberty to be able to practice the religion of your choice (or none at all) irrespective of what the majority of this country chooses? Or does it only include the "liberty" of others to believe and behave as YOU think they should?Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-24296755502433201882012-08-17T16:30:00.002-07:002012-08-17T17:15:18.631-07:00Anntoinette Romney<h6 class="uiStreamMessage" data-ft="{"type":1,"tn":"K"}">
<span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="userContent" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Dear Anntoinette Romney:<br /> <br />
You will never be First Lady, despite the fact that you very clearly
feel that the position is your due. EVERY first lady, including Laura
Bush, bless her heart for being married to that clod, exhibited the
ability to conduct herself with a certain level of grace and decorum.
It is the job of the First Lady (or First Gentleman, as the case may
be), to act as a buffer for the President, to carry out the duties of
the First Spouse in a dignified manner, and to exhibit kindness,
thoughtfulness and diplomacy, irrespective of Party affiliation. Even
if, by some longshot (or election fraud), your husband should somehow
gain the office, I'm sure he will immediately demote you and appoint one
of your more demure and graceful Sister Wives to the position.<br /> <br /> Love,<br /> </span></span></h6>
<h6 class="uiStreamMessage" data-ft="{"type":1,"tn":"K"}">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">
<span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span class="userContent">TV</span></span></span></h6>
Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-70304961914697205552012-06-20T17:59:00.001-07:002012-06-20T17:59:43.527-07:00Dear Debbie Stabenow: Fuck YouNo, seriously, fuck you. Fuck you and the whores you rode in on. You don't get to call yourself a Democrat and then vote to take food out of the mouths of children, you goddamned motherless whore.<br />
<br />
Debbie says:<br />
<br />
“I deeply care about protecting nutrition assistance programs I hope that that is not in doubt,” Stabenow said. “This is about accountability and integrity within the program, and I must oppose the amendment.”<br /><br />Read more: <a href="http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0612/77588.html#ixzz1yNvdqIhK" style="color: #003399;">http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0612/77588.html#ixzz1yNvdqIhK</a><br />
<br />
How about some accountability and integrity from the motherfucking Senate? You bet your sweet bippy that your support of nutrition assistance programs is in doubt. In fact, your support of nutrition assistance programs does not exist, as you just voted to boot thousands of families out of those programs. Eat a big bag of dicks, Debbie Stabenow, but you'd better be prepared to pay cash. Asshole.Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-40783355215342441252012-06-15T18:03:00.000-07:002012-06-15T18:03:03.018-07:00Ode to My Vagina<div class="dsq-comment-text" id="dsq-comment-text-558953945">
I have a Very Scary Vagina<br />I keep it close to me<br />Whenever I talk about it<br />It makes Republicans flee<br />
<br />
The Power of my Vagina<br />Must be more than I had thought<br />It's hard to comprehend<br />All the furor that it has wrought<br />
<br />
To me, it's just a body part<br />Nothing to fear or hate<br />To Republicans it's a commodity<br />That they must legislate <br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiufMG_BHT9Vvd8678-jvyHTo3fr2qfBRTYCQePp84ipsK96VxpU03Hv1t8zaXO3gS5waXml_0-NPmNsvn0hKMcKJH8isw47O2jNoA20kdHmicKy6Dl0uqJAMXsexuNs-Wnb_9WKLsfAtw/s1600/vagina_dentata.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiufMG_BHT9Vvd8678-jvyHTo3fr2qfBRTYCQePp84ipsK96VxpU03Hv1t8zaXO3gS5waXml_0-NPmNsvn0hKMcKJH8isw47O2jNoA20kdHmicKy6Dl0uqJAMXsexuNs-Wnb_9WKLsfAtw/s320/vagina_dentata.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.etsy.com/listing/100391633/ooak-vagina-dentata-fire-red-shiny-spiky?ref=sr_gallery_2&sref=sr_1608bebc99d97bf0570d27c1d323edc172196df07bcab0a2c72c304d6d76a777_1339727857_14267285_jewelry&ga_includes" target="_blank">Original image found here.</a></div>
<br />
</div>Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-55702191903110428622012-06-15T15:22:00.002-07:002012-06-15T15:22:29.053-07:00Friday Cat BloggingFound on the Interwebs:<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdQF3BrqhVQfOGpEsRIZdTox13cA7PfIVG3ZCNOl_NMm1c52R8MaK_2T8ZLzuwFBj0rxUtOAiUvgmF18JoM82_KTd81DTcJNk86yHlgQWiCH6_Ur3HQlBKS6kno0O8-4CfMPCJy2A8pJg/s1600/batcat.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdQF3BrqhVQfOGpEsRIZdTox13cA7PfIVG3ZCNOl_NMm1c52R8MaK_2T8ZLzuwFBj0rxUtOAiUvgmF18JoM82_KTd81DTcJNk86yHlgQWiCH6_Ur3HQlBKS6kno0O8-4CfMPCJy2A8pJg/s320/batcat.jpg" width="245" /></a></div>
<br />
<a href="https://www.facebook.com/geeksaresexy" target="_blank">Original photo found here.</a><br />Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-43471006284813143502012-06-15T11:17:00.000-07:002012-06-15T11:17:21.795-07:00VAGINA!If you're going to try to regulate it, you had damned well get comfortable talking about it. Thanks to <a href="http://echidneofthesnakes.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Echidne</a> for the link.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMFv4oO-muI&feature=youtu.be" target="_blank">The Vagina Song</a>Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-25516805608244839972012-06-08T09:59:00.000-07:002012-06-08T09:59:24.376-07:00Friday Cat BloggingPoor Vlad had an ingrown claw. Got him all fixed up, good as new.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibafmyjfVEHTq0W02vaJNsna0fSXFiXz1C5jAuHZKw2Czh0PpGqMdDIteDg9XLat90ObossF1yFGfNM57dOLgJDNDRhHf3GreGiCBcOwOOCopf4yYKZX45rjoKRZU8WymCWp74dag835I/s1600/vlad_1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibafmyjfVEHTq0W02vaJNsna0fSXFiXz1C5jAuHZKw2Czh0PpGqMdDIteDg9XLat90ObossF1yFGfNM57dOLgJDNDRhHf3GreGiCBcOwOOCopf4yYKZX45rjoKRZU8WymCWp74dag835I/s320/vlad_1.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-16382677256958691252012-06-06T14:24:00.000-07:002012-06-06T14:24:05.365-07:00It Would Be Irresponsible Not To Speculate<br />
<br />
From the "things that make you go hmmm" files.<br />
<br />
Has the Romney family <em>really</em> given up the polygamist tradition practiced by Willard/Mitt's very own grandfather, or have they just learned to better disguise it? I am informed by people who would know that it is not at all uncommon for polygamist Mormons to use a "surrogate" as cover for children born to anyone other than the First Wife. And, then, comes <a href="http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/politics/2012/05/mitt-romneys-eldest-son-has-twins-via-surrogate/" target="_blank">this.</a><br />
<br />
<em>"This the second time that Tagg, 42, and his wife, Jen,39, have used a
surrogate. The same surrogate was used for the twins carried their
youngest son Jonathan, who was born in August of 2010. Their other three
children were not born via surrogacy."</em><br />
<br />
So, two pregnancies, via the <em>same</em> surrogate, when clearly, the couple were able to reproduce on their own on three other occasions? I don't know, but it seems that some enterprising journalist might find a good story there. I'm just sayin'. <br />Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-70380266897535775192012-06-05T20:14:00.000-07:002012-06-05T20:14:19.741-07:00Fucking BullshitI've never been so disappointed in my life, and that's saying something. After watching all of those tens of thousands protesting in the Capitol, after seeing so many people work so hard, to see that so many people in Wisconsin went out and voted against their own interests, voted for a man that is so obviously contemptuous of them, just breaks my fucking heart. There will be calls of fraud, there will be protests about the monied interests swaying opinion, but the fact remains, the majority of people there were persuaded to vote in a way that very directly fucks them. I will never understand it. What in the fuck is wrong with people? Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3528325309192015659.post-78322942635926795232012-06-05T16:25:00.000-07:002012-06-05T16:25:15.319-07:00And Now, Some Good NewsThis is from May 22, but just now came to my attention. After wondering for months why the Medical Establishment has remained silent on the issue of the Republican War on Women, finally, the <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2012/06/05/opinion/reproductive-health.html?_r=3&emc=tnt&tntemail1=y&utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=post&utm_content=LTE&utm_campaign=ppactionfb" target="_blank">American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists</a> has finally spoken out. <br />
<br />
Not only does the deluge of anti-woman, anti-choice, anti-birth control legislation, both nationally and in the States negatively affect the health and well-being of millions of women, it also infringes on the rights of physicians to advise and treat their patients. In effect, legislators are practicing medicine without a license, and it's high time that they fucking stop. Kudos to the ACOG for speaking out.Thinly Veiledhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02319709482659287384noreply@blogger.com0